Friday, September 23, 2005

Finally, I have time to post....

I so wish that I would have finished school before I had kids! I kept procrastinating and changing my major, so I ended up giving up last time. I am glad I am going back, but it has been hard. I have to find uninterrupted time to do tests, study, etc. I tried to finish an essay while the kids were up, never again will I do that. It was way too hard. I did finish it tonight though, yipeee!!! By tomorrow, I will have a few days of no homework! That sounds so good to me. I have straight A's so far. My 1st 2 essays in my Rock and Roll History clkass have gotten 98%! My computer class is just getting started, but seems like I will be able to do decent in it. My Intro to Theater class is really easy. I am done with the 1st module 2 weeks early! I might finish up on the 2nd next week to free some time up for my other 2 classes.

I started going back to the gym last week! Mike is happy since I will be using what we have been paying for again, lol. I just finally feel comfortable going there again. I have been doing weights and cardio. I wake up so sore in the mornings, so I know I must be doing a good job. My little Bro is going to go with me on Monday and get a workout routine going for me. He is Mr. Muscles, so he should know how to help me.

I was able to really make the Gym sound enticing. I have been so stressed and needing time alone lately, but with babysitting, my kids and Mike in school and working 2 jobs, it has been so hard. So I decided that the Gym is my time alone. They have a daycare there, so my kids love that! I do my workout and have time to think by myself. I also get some of my school reading done while I am on the bike or treadmill. It has really been nice and makes going to the gym feel like a reward or a get-away.


I am pretty happy, but I am still finding myself being too judgemental on myself. Losing weight has made me feel better, but it ahs been hard too. I am having to notice some of the problems taht I used to escape by eating. Sometimes, especially lately I have noticed that when I get stressed or feel inadequate, I grab for food. I need to really focus on other solutions. Sometimes I am afraid to face the problem or try to change though. I just ahve a lot of faults and it is hard to change them.

Mike and I did have a good talk about that a few weeks ago. He did help me put some things in perspective. He told me to think of the problems I have in terms of things I can control and things I can't. It has helped. It helped me realize I am doing better than I thought I was. I have always admired the way that he can brush tings off and not let them bother him. Also I wish I could speak my mind the way he does. We decided taht together we would make the perfect person...we could speak our mind, but be tactful..lol.

I am at 51 lbs lost since January! It is harder lately. I have days that I totally mess up. I just need to start over sooner and not let it ruin my whole week. I finally got back to my W meeting this last week and that ahs helped alot. I am at a size 16, just one size away from being out of plus sizes. YIpeee!!!!

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My Weight Loss